I Wasn't Always This Focused...

It was a long winding road to writing and publishing my first novel. As a child I wanted to be a veterinarian, zoologist and an astronomer. Unfortunately, I hated math. So that kinda put the kibosh on that. But I wrote my first story in the 3rd grade and I have never forgotten that story or how much I loved writing it. But in Jr. High I had a segment on the morning announcements called "Ask Twyla", it was a video advice column. I fell in love with that and decided I wanted to be the next Oprah.

In college I still wanted to take the path to being the next Oprah, so I majored in Radio/TV. The classes were mainly focused on the news, which I hated because I felt that the news was either boring or depressing. I worked as a reporter for the student run news station. And again I hated it.

My minor on the other hand...Creative Writing...was my favorite. I freakin' loved those classes and professors. I rarely ever skipped a class and I thrived on writing short stories and poems. And looking back I should have switched majors, but I was already on the 5 year bachelors plan and my parents would have killed me if I stayed one more year.

So I graduated in a field that I wasn't feeling in the least and into a crap-tastic economy. I went straight to work at the place I had been working at during breaks in my last year of college. A casino, working the graveyard shift. And boy did I have a blast just goofing off. I had no idea what I really wanted to do and since I hadn't done even one internship, I had no contacts or connections in my field.

My parents were frustrated with me and I was with myself. But I was so busy partying like it was 1999 and confused by what I really wanted to do, that I didn't care as much as I should have.

I spent the next several years having a great time. But right as I was coming to the end of my twenties and quickly approaching thirty, I started freaking out and getting depressed. My friends and other people I knew were getting engaged, married, had good paying jobs, buying homes on their own or with their significant others. And I was still struggling, no good job, a dead end relationship and no real vision of the future.

Cherry Blossoms at Tsuyama Castle

So I packed up my bags and with the help of my
family I moved to Japan to teach English for one year. And I had the best time of my life. And while I was there enjoying life, I realized a very important lesson. Many of those same friends whose lives I envied, starting falling apart (for those friends reading this, I love you and I'm so glad and grateful that all of you are doing so well now). Many were breaking up with their men, losing their jobs and/or trying to find a way to sell those same homes they had bought with their men. The lesson learned: NEVER EVER envy someone else's life.

"It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection." -Bhagavad Gita (Eat, Pray, Love)

I learned that I do things in my own time, at my own pace. And I'm still not there yet, but I still don't want anyone else's life either.

One of my MANY classes.

Long Beach, CA.

When I came back from the states, I moved to California for four years and then moved to Arizona, to live with my parents again. I was here in AZ for two months when one day, it was like someone flipped my inner light switch to ON, I picked up my laptop and fifteen days later I had written the first draft of my first
manuscript. I had no idea I had it in me. And having recently released my fourth novel in one year, I'm still in the "shock and awe" stage of this journey. I feel more pride in this accomplishment than I did when I graduated college. Because I graduated unsure of myself and what I wanted to do with my life. But I've never been more sure of what I want to do, than I am right now. So everyday I work at getting my writing career off the ground. I wake up at 6 a.m. every morning. And I'm constantly trying to work on something: a new novel, promoting, connecting with readers, this blog, whatever.

My parents' backyard and sometimes my office.

For years I thought that I was just lazy. But it was lack of focus and not knowing what I wanted to do that was the problem. Once I set my mind to something that I truly want, I'll work my ass off for it. So if you're not there yet, don't worry and just have faith that it'll come when the time is right.

I look a little rough because it was early. :)

Success is a constant uphill struggle. But I have strapped on my hiking boots, got my Gandalf walking stick, pulled on my backpack that I'm filling with knowledge along the way and climbing that son of a b!tch!